Spring Break, WOOOO!

March 31, 2010 at 6:34 am (Uncategorized)

I’m now on Spring Break, which I imagine would be totally awesome if I had been toiling away teaching since September, but seeing as how I’ve only stepped foot in each of my classrooms twice so far, this Spring Break does not feel deserved.  In fact, it’s making me downright antsy.  Aside from a bit of lesson planning, I don’t have much work to do, which leaves me lots of worrying time.

My teaching residency will end in mid-May, which means that I’ve had to start applying for jobs for the summer and beyond.  Ideally I’d like to teach for a summer program, so that’s where I’ve been concentrating my search efforts, but that means that come August, I’d again be in the same boat I’m in now.  For someone, such as myself, who loves to make plans for the future, this is particularly stressful.

The toughest part of leaving my old job was abandoning the stability.  I liked being able to count on a paycheck appearing in my bank account on the last business day of each month and having a set calendar of meetings and company holidays two years in advance.  For someone who is an improvisor, I ironically enough don’t handle uncertainty all that well.

As I’m searching for my next gig, I find myself stricken with fears of being turned down for every job I apply for, and having to go back to temping and moving back in with my parents.  Yikes.  I assume (hope) it won’t come to that,  but since I really don’t know quite what to expect, I can’t help but have those kinds of worries.  I’m sure that once I’m back to being busy these worries won’t surface as often, but it’s a pain having to deal with them right now.


1 Comment

  1. Larissa said,

    Yo lady! I love your blog, and want to tell you, in the year I’ve been a true blue freelancer (I prefer the term rogue agent) I’ve applied to roughly a bajillion jobs. Okay, more like 50. Bajillion. I got turned down for most of them, but the ones I didn’t get turned down for ended up (or currently are) some of the most fun and rewarding stretches of work I’ve ever had, that have built strong friendships, skills, connectionz, and character…if not exactly my bank account.

    Of course, it sucks to not “get” the jobs you think you’d be perfect for. Chicago Public Library Youth Services Division and Jellyvision, I’m looking at you. But I think the trick is remembering a job is a job is a job…you’ll catch the break you want if, and only if, you never stop grindstoning your nose, picking yourself up, dusting yourself off, and trying again.

    I find playing the Rocky theme song on loop in my brain helps.

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